Decisions

if you think about someone hard enough
do they think about you?
questions I ask myself whenever I can’t process
were through
are you sure?
don’t you miss when it was just us?
full of love, full of lust
it was worth it once upon a time
but I guess that all stopped once I couldn’t decide
once you couldn’t rely
on me
once I couldn’t decide
if you were enough for me
it wasn’t as simple as you wanted to make it
I fell out of love with you
and cared too much to fake it
so I waited…
for our flame to be rekindled
for these new feelings to dwindle
figured if I waited long enough they would go away
and I was wrong
not only did they stay, they led me astray
to feel all I’ve never felt
caught up with things I had never dealt
with you left in the wind
clueless not knowing where to begin
I met a love that angered me
a love that consumed and spit me out
a love that left me full of doubt
a love I probably should’ve let go of
but I know I had gone without
and this made me hate you
for not giving me all the pain I was experiencing
away from you
you were soft and gentle and I was bulletproof
what did I do to you?
played a sick game and said I was through with you
I had decided
that you weren’t enough man for me
that this new love was grand for me
and now I’m alone you see
cliché “grass ain’t greener” was designed for me
but i’m back on your steps asking
have you thought about me as much as I have you?
it hasn’t been long, have you processed us being through?

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